faith & trust

i'm finding it difficult.
what to do when i have great faith, but little trust?
i guess my answer is to just do.
the trust comes and goes, it's just based on my own shallow notions
while the faith is based on my expectations.
i expect that god will be as he has always been,
     as the ages have seen him to be
     as is the testimony of the wise
          that he will love the same
right now my trust is so small
i find my faith looking over at him
     what's the matter with you?
     grow up!
          shifting sand
he hasn't changed,
     you neither would
          nor could
     scare him away
so what's your problem, man?
leave me alone.
everything seems like a mountain around me.
     and knowing that it should be like sand beneath me
          doesn't help
anyway, don't be a jerk.
we're different stuff.
you believe.
i'm shown.
     i don't get your luxury.
knock it off already.
maybe so, but i am your older brother.
i don't stop just because you want me to.
i know you have to be shown.
let me show you.
you face victory.
you face trial.
you're strong.
you're weak.
     he is beyond.


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